Saturday, 4 June 2011

Parents Today are a Disgrace

Reading the paper today, I came upon yet another article about the disgraceful neglect of children today by parents who are too busy earning money for luxuries to look after their own children. These are children that are planned and allegedly wanted, but once here neglected in a way that should be punishable by law in my eyes.

There are horror stories of children going to primary schools who are in nappies, unable to drink unless out of a bottle, who don't know what knives and forks are and some are even unable to speak! This is a total disgrace and having seen the way children behave and eat wherever I go these days, I think it's high time something was done about it.

The excuse for all this neglect is that the parents say they are too busy working as they have to earn enough to pay all the bills and that these days they can't afford to live unless both work. Well call me old fashioned, but there are very few families today who really do need to have two jobs to pay the bills. The reason all of them do is because they cannot wait for anything anymore. When we got married years ago, we waited for what we couldn't afford and saved up for it. We didn't have cars, central heating, washing machines,  dish washers, microwaves, disposable nappies and a house full of everything a woman could want so she could do as little work as possible. If they have all of that fine, good for them, but not if it means neglecting children they chose to have to then foist on others who have already raised theirs - the hard way!

I have never had a credit card in my life and hope I never will. There were always people who bought on what we called, the never never, but they were in the minority and the rest of us lived without being greedy or demanding everything to make life easy as possible for us. That is why most of us didn't owe money then unlike the majority today who all have credit cards (and not just one) and who live off credit all the time until they are in hock for thousands of pounds then moan the government and the world is to blame for their greed.

None of us were any the worse off for not having all the things young women have and demand today, in fact, we are all stronger, more capable, less spoilt and the most important fact - we were happier. Yes times were hard, but we were much happier, more contented and we all brought up our children with love as well as discipline. We taught them manners; how to eat, how to behave in public, how to play without screaming, how to hold the knife in the right hand not the left as many seem to do today, how to hold a fork with prongs facing down and held in the left hand and we also taught them how to say please, thank you and excuse me. The most important word they learned first was 'no'.

None of our children were allowed to be adults before they were children. They wore children's clothes that didn't have designer labels, went to bed early in the evening as befits children so we didn't need watersheds on television, they were taught what was right or wrong and they had an odd smack here and there when needed. If they misbehaved when out, a policeman would give them a clip around the ear and drag them home where they'd get another clip from mum or dad. Strangely, in the days of smacking a child, hardly any grew up to be violent unlike today's thugs who have never received discipline and who pull knives on people if you so much as look at them. If we went out as a family for a meal, we went to places suitable for children like cafĂ©'s and restaurants, not pubs which were for adults. Nowadays, pubs are where children go so the adults have to go elsewhere to get away from them.

This sick, sad world with its new parents and lack of parenting, means children mock the police as their parents teach them to do so, they are allowed to grow and 'express themselves' (what would happen if I 'expressed myself' by discipling them when they bang into my 85 year old mother and hurt her I wonder?), They're rude, loud, abusive and completely out of control, eat as though it's chimps feeding time at the zoo (in fact chimps have better manners) and all because these silly, trendy parents with daft names like 'yummy mummy' are all too busy trying to look pretty, spending money on all their false nails, hair extensions and the like rather than spending time with children they should be teaching to be proper human beings people will like.

As a parent, I wanted everyone to think my son was lovely - and he was and still is - to enable that, he was taught how to behave, eat, sit, drink and be polite. As such, everyone thought he was a lovely child. Today, most people think children are ghastly and go out of their way to avoid where any will be. How sad that these poor children have parents who don't care if they're hated by the whole world? How sad they will grow in into adults that will have no respect for anyone and unable to mix in society.

These children are going to grow into adults who will never be able to achieve no matter how clever they are. Their parents have seen to that as they aren't teaching them anything at all about what is acceptable behaviour and what isn't. It's not only sad, but in my eyes it's criminal. Years ago the NSPCC would have taken children so neglected into care and placed them with someone who would be a real parent to them. Sadly, they can't do that now as they'd end up taking the majority of children off their parents because about 75% of the children born today are sad little children who have parents too clueless and selfish to care about them and their futures because they're too wrapped up in their own materialistic lives.

I can almost guarantee that any comments I get will be in two camps. The women who brought their children up properly will agree with me, the new age 'sickly named 'yummy mummy brigade' will probably disagree with me strongly and insist their money isn't for luxuries but is needed. Strange how their hard earned money leaves so much left over for the latest fashionable clothes, make-up, hair styles, colourings etc. isn't it? I've yet to see the majority looking like they really are struggling to live. A few maybe, but certainly not as many as pretend to be.


  1. I am in the first camp and proud to be!

    We've worked hard for what I have. I did laundry by hand until we could afford a washer after the birth of our first child. Then Hubby bought me a dryer when I was pregnant with the second.

    My children have manners and can fit well in any situation. Thankfully, they are raising their children with manners and respect, too.

    Excellent post.

  2. I'm kind of stuck for words on this because I'd like to think I fall into the first category and certainly would never class myself as a yummy mummy, wellies and flat caps more like, but then again, I love my dishwasher, sky telly, tumble dryer and washing machine, and I never iron, hardly even clean unless it's desperately needed and am bringing up a child with autism who is not your average child anyway.

    I do know what you're saying and I agree on most counts, but times have changed - perhaps a difference of opinion whether it's for the better or worse, but if we don't move with the times, we get left behind and end up feeling very bitter towards those who have. I could never have worked away from home after having Amy but I've been lucky.

    However, my other thoughts to this post are this: if a couple have children, however many, then both go out working full time and have to pay a nanny, aupair, child minder etc, I honestly don't see the point in having children at all. That's the old-fashioned in me and the way I was brought up. But I would never wish to judge those who do want to work full time, even if it's not just for the money.

    Just my humble opinion. CJ xx

  3. Times have moved on and I begrudge no one all the trappings that come with that, but I do when it means children are neglected in order to have it all. Don't have children is the answer.

    I am glad to have it all too, but I would give it all away tomorrow if it meant neglecting my son.

  4. I agree with you Lorraine. I'm happy to say that my two sons are raising their children the way I raised them, to be polite and not spoil, though they do have all the luxuries you mention.