Tuesday, 10 January 2017


     What drives a person to commit suicide and how many do so who have shown no outer sign to anyone that anything was wrong? Depression is something so few people understand unless they have been in the same situation themselves. This can be said for those meant to be in the professions that are there to counsel and help. They go by text books only and what they 'think' they know from other cases.
     Yes, other cases, for 'cases' is what each person is to them. Another name, in another file that can be put away with all the rest in a filing cabinet and forgotten about until they next come in for their appointment. That's if they come back, for one day some won't, because they are no longer part of this world.
     Those who talk about suicide most, are often the ones who don't carry it through. Obviously it can be said of some, but how many people have you heard or read about where no note was left and no one has any idea why they did it? Quite a lot aren't there?
     The other day, I bumped into an old school friend. Like me, we're both getting on in age now and have ailments that come with increasing years. Some have always been with us, but as a youngster they weren't so bad and obvious, age though has a habit of changing things.

Monday, 2 January 2017

Eczema and Chocolate

     Christmas and New Year have taught me something I hadn't realised - chocolate causes my eczema. At least I think it does. I often suffer from dry, red scaly patches of eczema on the bridge of my nose and up into my forehead. It can go into my eyes meaning I can't wear make-up most of the time and even deep into my ears.

     The ears are the worst part in some ways, because they then get infected, become very raw, bleed and cause infection. They also cause swelling as the infection spreads to the jaw, thereby making it hard to eat and rendering me pretty deaf until the drops work and the swelling reduces again.

     As many of you following this blog might know, I've been struggling with my weight for some time now. In the last year, I was diagnosed with diabetes - a much needed wake up call - and so recent months saw me cutting right back on sugary things.

Monday, 26 December 2016

Becoming Disabled.

     Finding myself now disabled due to severe foot pain. I decided to talk about the experiences and treatment I have been on the receiving end of from others. I am stunned, totally stunned, how people often ignore me now or treat me as though my brain too is impaired. They ignore how much pain I am in and often refuse to accept it is happening to me at all.
My family refused point blank for the last few years to accept I was struggling badly to walk, thinking I could use mind over matter to overcome it. Yet the last three years or so have seen my life alter drastically due to being unable to walk far or stand for long.
     In some ways, I can understand why my family refused to acknowledge it, because we are people who are very positive thinkers and see challenges and problems as things to be overcome rather than given in to. I myself even refused to accept my increasing lameness, as I struggled to remain mobile, due to the same way of thinking. However, there are some things in life the power of positive thinking can't help, and this is one of them.
     When life alters and you become almost housebound, then it is pretty obvious something is wrong. Even when that happened and I did become almost housebound, I tried to tell myself I was fine and it was just that I didn't want to go out - anything rather than admit the truth.